Episode Transcript
[00:00:02] Speaker A: You're listening to the Known Legacy Podcast, brought to you by Known Legacy Ministries. For more information, go to knownlegacy.org now here's your hosts, Bill and Travis.
Good morning, Bill.
[00:00:17] Speaker B: I was messing around, making faces and whatnot, and then I realized, wait, we're
[00:00:23] Speaker A: gonna go back camera.
[00:00:25] Speaker B: Hey, Good morning, everybody. We're so glad you're here. Welcome to Known Legacy Podcast, where we want you to wake up, gear up, come alive to who COD has called you to be. Thank you so much for being a part of today.
[00:00:34] Speaker A: Did you say cod?
Did you just say cod?
Who God wants you to be.
We all know you intended God, but I promise you, I heard Cod rewind 30 seconds, stop it and see me. Okay, so anyways, yes, we're happy you're here. Waking up, gearing up, and coming alive.
[00:00:54] Speaker B: God wants you. God, God. God wants you to be.
[00:00:56] Speaker A: Not the great Cod in the sky.
[00:00:59] Speaker B: That's not a bad fish, though.
[00:01:00] Speaker A: No, no, no.
The British people love it.
[00:01:04] Speaker B: Man, we're so glad you guys are here.
Thank you guys for putting up with us again. And we are so glad that we're back here to have another great podcast. We're excited about our guest, very much so.
[00:01:15] Speaker A: Talking about restoration to marriages. And so if that's something you or someone you know is struggling with, you definitely want to check this one out and listen in.
[00:01:22] Speaker B: Absolutely, absolutely. Well, man, we have a lot of great things coming up as we get started. We have our men's Tree coming up April 10th through the 12th. We'd love to have you there. There are still some spots available for you to be a part of that. There's. There'll be a link below for you to sign up. Spots are. Are filling up. So.
[00:01:36] Speaker A: And this is not just for the old men. This is for young college kids, too. So 18 and over is what we're talking about. And there is some discounts if you are in college.
And Bill, put a hard line at 30. If you're still in college at 30, you don't get the discount. I don't know why I said that,
[00:01:50] Speaker B: but if you're living with your parents, we can make something out. We do have scholarships available.
Like, you know. Just kidding. For anybody.
We understand the times can be hard. We'd love for you to be a part of what we're doing. As well as that, we also have a Thursday morning Bible study that we would love you to be a part of called Adrenaline Shot that we'll have a link below for you as well. Starts at 6. 45 in the morning. Great way to connect with other men all throughout the country and would love to have you be a part of that. So we'll have some links in there. But man, it is so great to see your face, Travis.
[00:02:18] Speaker A: It is good to see your face too, Bill.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: Thank you so much. I wanted. That's pretty much why I said that.
[00:02:22] Speaker A: And good morning to Kyle in the corner.
[00:02:24] Speaker C: Hello.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: It's good to have you here too, Kyle. Doing what you do, man.
[00:02:27] Speaker B: A few words.
[00:02:28] Speaker A: So, as always, infolegacy.org if you have any questions, comments, concerns, prayer requests, or if you have any suggestions for the question of the day.
[00:02:37] Speaker B: Question of the day.
Actually, no. That is a huge thing, guys. We want you, if you have a question, I mean, you might be out there going, I got a way better question of the day. These guys.
[00:02:47] Speaker A: Thank you.
[00:02:48] Speaker B: You need to send it to us in what known legacy? We're waiting for you. Question of the day is infoownlegacy.org we'd love to hear your question of the day because ours are good, but yours might be gooder.
[00:03:00] Speaker A: Yes, yes. Might be a lot gooder.
[00:03:02] Speaker B: Lot gooder.
[00:03:03] Speaker A: So anyways, the question of the day.
[00:03:04] Speaker B: Question of the day has been inspired
[00:03:06] Speaker A: by some young millennial men that I have come to know. And they have an odd, I would say, hobby.
[00:03:13] Speaker B: Time out. Are there young millennial men anymore?
[00:03:16] Speaker A: Well, okay. Middle aged. Middle aged millennial men.
[00:03:19] Speaker B: Welcome to real life millennials.
[00:03:21] Speaker C: To Travis.
[00:03:21] Speaker B: They're young, Travis.
[00:03:25] Speaker A: Says the 60 year old man in the corner.
At least I can still see him. Anyways, they, they, they, their hobby is Lego. And so they will go out and they'll buy and then they'll construct. Like one of the guys that I'm thinking of, he has an entire room in his house dedicated to his Legos and he creates like castles and all of these things. And then he brings his kids in and tells them stories using the Legos. Right. Which I think is fascinating. And then another guy, he does it. And then this is a blending of two hobbies. I gu.
Dungeons and Dragons. Is that okay?
[00:03:59] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:04:00] Speaker A: But he does it with like setting up LEGO settings. And so they're journeying through all these different lego. It's way beyond me. Way beyond me. So the question actually is, if money was not an issue, what would be your hobby? Like, if money was not an issue, what would be your hobby? Bill, you're first.
[00:04:17] Speaker B: Kyle, you're first. I got to think about, I think
[00:04:22] Speaker C: that I, my hobby is gonna have to be learning how to fish in the ocean, learning how to Drive a boat in the ocean or sail or whatever.
And.
Yeah. Learning how to survive on the. On the water.
[00:04:38] Speaker A: For context, listen to our previous podcast about what we would want our retirement to be.
[00:04:44] Speaker B: Yes, yes. Yes. Hobbies.
I think if I. If I could think about it, I would say woodworking. Oh, you took mine, like, building a lot of stuff, like, because I just got to build some planters for Sarah, and. And, man, they were so much fun to make. And then I realized how, like, peaceful it is. I got my music on. I literally had my yacht rock on the background.
It was awesome. And. And just got to sit in my garage and build stuff. And nobody was like. I mean, time kind of flew away, and it was nice. I think that'd be what I would do. But I would. I would probably build so much stuff, she'd be like, just stop.
[00:05:20] Speaker A: But you could sell it. Oh, you and Sarah could be like the old couple at all the fairs.
[00:05:24] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:05:24] Speaker A: Kind of awkward. People that wear matching outfits.
[00:05:27] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:05:27] Speaker A: And sell your woodworking stuff.
[00:05:28] Speaker B: Come over for dinner.
[00:05:30] Speaker C: Wear your Dutch clothes.
[00:05:33] Speaker B: Dutch clothes.
What about you, Travis?
[00:05:36] Speaker A: Well, because you took. You took woodworking.
[00:05:39] Speaker B: Well, you can do it too.
[00:05:41] Speaker A: There's a coat.
[00:05:42] Speaker C: The non legacy wood factory.
[00:05:45] Speaker A: The.
I'm gonna do even worse. I'm gonna do pottery.
Because. Because that's the kind of guy I am. You know, just getting your hands in the mud and throwing together, like, a dozen coffee cups.
[00:05:59] Speaker B: Remember the movie Ghost picture you and your wife, and they're like, oh, my.
Like that. There you are doing your little pottery thing.
[00:06:10] Speaker A: I can guarantee my wife would have nothing to do with that.
It would be.
[00:06:15] Speaker B: It would be. Bill.
Be like, get away from me knowing legacy pottery. Actually, we could do that.
[00:06:21] Speaker A: So I. I would. I'd probably do pottery.
[00:06:23] Speaker B: We're off the rails already.
[00:06:24] Speaker A: We are completely off the rails. But I love it. So anyways, introduce our guests, and let's see what their hobbies would be.
[00:06:29] Speaker B: Man, these are some good friends. My Brian and Alyssa Fields. We're so excited to have them on today.
Great to see you guys. Great to see you guys. So we're so glad to have you guys on.
So what about you? What about you? If you guys have hobby. If money wasn't an option, what would your hobbies be?
[00:06:48] Speaker D: Thanks for having us. We're super excited. And I would love to hear Brian's hobby first.
I'm dying to know.
[00:06:55] Speaker A: That's the sound of the bus rolling over you, Brian.
[00:06:59] Speaker C: Because she knows that I'm lame, and I don't have any hobbies, so I would say I love fitness, and so I would probably.
I would probably perfect my pickleball game so that I could just go out and absolutely destroy all.
[00:07:15] Speaker D: You never play pickleball with us.
[00:07:18] Speaker C: Well, this is just because I have to work, and they said that if. If money wasn't enough.
Yeah. So I would go out. Just dominate the pickleball court.
[00:07:29] Speaker B: Professional pickleball player. Based on your fitness level, I would say you're doing great with your hobby so far. So I don't. Don't feel too ashamed about that.
[00:07:38] Speaker A: I do love the moment, which is like, you never play pickleball with us.
[00:07:43] Speaker B: Welcome to counseling with known legacy.
[00:07:46] Speaker C: Yeah. This is gonna be an interesting podcast, guys.
[00:07:49] Speaker B: Oh, we're so excited. Alyssa, what about you? What about you?
[00:07:52] Speaker D: Oh, I'm a geek, so I really. This is.
I guess if you know me, you know this, but I love puzzles. Love puzzles, so I know that the right answer. I mean, if, like, of course we want to travel with our kids, you know.
[00:08:06] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:08:07] Speaker D: I would really, like. Wooden puzzles are very expensive, and so I think I would get some really cool, unique puzzles.
I'm not one to, like, paste them and stick them on a wall or anything like that, but I just think there are some fun puzzles. I did my first one over Christmas, and I loved it, and so. And then I moved to a mystery puzzle. There's some good puzzles out there, so we have been enlightened over the last couple months. And then Brian stays far, far, far away.
[00:08:34] Speaker C: Yeah, that sounds amazing.
[00:08:39] Speaker A: A mystery puzzle is this where you get a bunch of pieces and you have no idea what the picture is, and you just got to go from scratch and try to figure it out?
[00:08:45] Speaker D: I think that's a surprise puzzle.
[00:08:48] Speaker A: Oh, they have a surprise puzzle.
[00:08:50] Speaker C: Come on, Travis.
[00:08:51] Speaker D: Yes. So this one is a mystery puzzle, and it's actually. I AM not on TikTok, but the kids say it's all over TikTok. And you put a puzzle. You can get it at Target. It's called a mystery puzzle, and it has a thousand pieces, and then once it's done, you shift the sides around, and then it leaves the middle, and then you put the rest of the pieces together to reveal what's going on within the puzzle. And I did an artifacts one. It's an artifacts at the museum, so you get to see where, like, the dinosaur came from and that. The. You know, all the animals and stuff. It's. It's a. It's just fun. And, yeah, he makes fun of me, but I love whimsical. And just.
[00:09:29] Speaker B: That's cool.
[00:09:30] Speaker D: Make you feel good stuff.
[00:09:32] Speaker A: Yes. And please hear this like, there is a cottage industry for everyone.
[00:09:36] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:09:36] Speaker A: You know, I love it.
[00:09:38] Speaker B: That's amazing.
[00:09:38] Speaker A: I'm like, wood puzzles. I get those words going together. Fun and puzzle, I don't get going together. But then this mystery or surprise puzzle that's like, even, like another, like, a layer. I'm like, I can't. My mind doesn't compute.
[00:09:49] Speaker B: I.
I knew that was putting together, like, a black puzzle with all those pieces, and I was like, no, no, no. Never. Never.
[00:09:56] Speaker A: Seems like purgatory.
[00:09:57] Speaker D: I think, actually, I would never do. They have to be fun? They have to be bright. And the wood puzzles are cool because the pieces have shapes. They're all different.
[00:10:04] Speaker B: That's kind of cool. It's probably a fun experience.
[00:10:08] Speaker A: You know, if only I knew someone who wanted to go into woodworking and could create his own wood puddles.
[00:10:12] Speaker D: You could create them for me.
[00:10:14] Speaker A: Look at this.
[00:10:15] Speaker B: I could use my resources for them. And Brian could just keep on looking good. I don't know how that works. Brian.
I love it. This is awesome. Guys, we're so glad to have you on today. Thank you for putting up with our craziness. But, man, I wanted to get you guys back on. You guys that were on a couple of years ago. Actually a few, like, pre Covid. So we're talking, like, at least 30 years ago at this point now. Yeah, feels like it in, like, human years now. It's like, it's been so long. But share a little bit about who you guys are with our new listeners and kind of your story. Share a little about where you guys kind of everything that you kind of went through.
We'd love to hear that. So take some time.
Yeah.
[00:10:52] Speaker C: So again, my name is Brian, and this is my wife, Alyssa. And we've been together for 20 years. And we like to tell people that we've been happily married for nine.
So we, you know, I kind of grew up in the church and in a very kind of small town, legalistic church and a lot of rules and a lot of not much fun.
So I rebelled against that as a kid and, you know, just really kind of spun off and through my college years and just really didn't have a relationship with the Lord, you know, just knew what I knew from church and got married my senior year in college and just kind of moved off to St. Louis, Missouri, and ended up getting a divorce. All that to say I came back to Midland four years later as a single man and ended up getting set up on a blind date with Alyssa.
[00:11:56] Speaker D: Yeah, that's true. So I grew up in the church. Grew up. Grace filled, total grace.
Understand God's love. Super easy for me to grasp. Um, and so this. He came. Well, so, yeah, we were set up on a blind date. Um, I was, I was early. Well, I was like 24, I guess, when we met. But it's. It was. I mean, you want to know the story about the blind date? We probably already said it, didn't we?
[00:12:21] Speaker A: Yeah, but let's recap that because I would love to know. Like, so you get set up on the blind date. What's your first reaction? What's your first thoughts? And how does that go? And. And like, did you both know you wanted to pursue it or was it one that was again, like, I'm not sure. But after the pursuit, you're like, okay, I'm in, you know?
[00:12:38] Speaker D: Yes. So he gets out of the car and I was like, well, okay, I'm done with men. Like, I'm like, I'm. I'm tired of playing games. I'm tired of being disrespectful. I'm just done. So the bar was already high anyway, and so he stepped out of his truck and I was like, he's got a truck. That's a good start.
[00:12:55] Speaker A: And then middling.
[00:12:57] Speaker D: Well, here's the thing is I was. I was way more into working out than he was at this time. And so he was actually a meathead and he was very buff.
But just so I didn't realize this part, but until we started running, because I was like, hey, you know, I'm done with men. And I. If you want to meet me, we can go to the track and run. And so we met at the Lee track. He gets out of his truck. I'm like, he's a good looking guy. And so I'm like, yeah, let's run. I don't know what I said. I just start out like, let's just run. And you're like, okay. And so we get one.
One trip around the track. And he was like, can we sit down?
And so we sit on the track and we just laid it all out. And I was like, well, nice to meet you. See you later. Not interested at all.
[00:13:48] Speaker B: She was running faster than you were in life.
[00:13:50] Speaker A: And I love the fact because if.
If my wife had invited me to go for a jog the first day, we never would have met. I would have been like, nope, nope. Like holding a donut at the time with my defibril. On my backpack just in case the diodes hooked up. Just in case. Here, sweetheart. If I fall, just hit this button
[00:14:08] Speaker B: and I'll be back in.
Okay, so. So first date was not like, a win. What. How did you guys connect up? I mean, like, like, what happened after that?
[00:14:18] Speaker C: Well, I knew that she was not interested in me, and that made me more interested in her because Alyssa.
[00:14:27] Speaker A: Alyssa. It's a Hallmark movie.
[00:14:30] Speaker C: Yeah.
She showed up and she was wearing glasses because she was about to have Lasik surgery. And I was like, this. This chick's kind of nerdy. I dig it.
[00:14:39] Speaker D: No, but before that. Before that, my name.
[00:14:43] Speaker C: Yeah. So like I said, we were set up on a blind date, and her maiden name is Jolly. And I'm like, great, it's probably going to be some fat chick because I
[00:14:53] Speaker A: was like Santa Claus's daughter.
[00:14:55] Speaker C: Santa Claus. I was like, this doesn't go well. But I was. I was pleasantly surprised and.
And just talking to her, she was different. I knew that she wasn't like any other girl that I had met before, and there was just something about her that.
[00:15:13] Speaker A: That.
[00:15:13] Speaker C: That made me want to pursue her. So she said she was interested guys. But we met and married within nine months.
[00:15:21] Speaker A: Boy.
[00:15:22] Speaker D: Okay, but here's the thing is I wasn't interested in him because we laid it all out on the table, and I had to get expectations of what I was looking for. He had been married before. We grew up different backgrounds.
And so it just kind of started this journey.
And I did have Lasik surgery. And he just was such a sweet friend through that, just checking on me because he had had the same surgery previously. And so he was just a friend. And I really appreciated him. His. His respect for me. And just his interest in. What I realize now is like, what. What I'm interested in, he's interested in kind of thing I really wanted to dive into. Why do you believe what you believe? Is it because that's what the church has told you, or have you come to your. The conclusion on your own? And so we started digging into the Bible and just started.
And at the time, I thought he had his own walk with the Lord. And so it was.
Yeah, so that was kind of how that happened so quickly after and I'm not interested reaction.
So he just kept pursuing and kept diving in. And so that's how. That's how it happened.
[00:16:32] Speaker A: So. So you date for nine months, you get married, and then everything's amazing. Right? Just like all the Hallmark movies, like. Like, you get there, it's angels, you know, Lasik's working. You know, you're both happily ever. Happily ever.
Like, when did the first signs of.
[00:16:51] Speaker D: Okay, so if we got married in. We got married in what, July.
And we met in October, I think. Right. And so at Christmas, we met in October.
December or November? November. December. He put up my Christmas lights for me on my house because I'm super independent. I'm an only child. I have my own house, I have my own career. I'm doing my own thing. And so he comes and puts Christmas lights on the house, and then we get married in July and Christmas rolls around again and he's like, there's no way I'm putting Christmas tree, putting lights on that house because I'm terrified of heights. So we put on this, this crazy facade. And so things, things just kind of, you know, opened up pretty quick. And so I think that little, that, that degree of separation happened quickly.
[00:17:39] Speaker B: Oh, wow.
[00:17:41] Speaker D: Into.
So, yeah, it kind of, it, it started out fine, I think the first little bit. Right.
[00:17:49] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:17:50] Speaker C: Well, you know, we both, we didn't have kids, obviously, and so we both good jobs and so we made good money, so we were able to travel and do fun things. And I think, I think once the newness of that started to wear off, then that's when we really started kind of. And then, you know, you can only fake it so long, right?
[00:18:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:14] Speaker C: Not that I was faking it, but Alyssa had this idea of what it looked like to be a spiritual leader in the home because she had that example set for her by her father.
[00:18:23] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:24] Speaker C: And I did not, I did not have that in my home. So she had this expectation of what it looked like for me to be a spiritual leader. I had no idea what that was.
And so we just were not on the same page with that. And it, and it really started to affect our relationship.
[00:18:41] Speaker B: Yeah. So. So you're saying. So the cracks started exposing themselves.
Bring us to that point when you said, hey, this may not be what we want to do together anymore.
[00:18:51] Speaker D: Yeah. It was just years and years of just coexisting, I think is how we got to that point. And for me it was, I'm driven. I'm. I want to get things done. So super. I wanted to be the CEO of the company I worked for. Super driven. And Brian's like, I'll be a stay at home hubby.
And I'm like, no, you're going to go do something.
[00:19:10] Speaker B: You're going to be productive.
[00:19:12] Speaker D: And so he was happy to travel. Like, just go wherever the job took me. And that sort of thing. And so we were looking at moving and all these things. And so it ended up that we stayed in where we met and married, but it was just. It really is that one degree of separation, and I think you just keep that one degree over time. So it was probably, you know, it got to that point of we had kids and it just started. You get so involved with the children. We have two kids and just get involved in their lives. And so it just became we were coexisting. And then I had a lot of resentment for him because he was not the man that I thought he was, and he wasn't like me. And we've learned so much over the years, but I really tried to control him, to make him be more like me. And even in the beginning, you know, my dad, who was a spiritual leader in my house, in our house growing up, he would give Brian books, and I would recommend this men's group and do this and all of that. And that just made the situation worse for Brian. And so me trying to control everything was the demise on my side of the marriage.
[00:20:27] Speaker A: So, Brian, what about you?
As this is going on, she's reflecting and she's getting frustrated and she's nagging, for lack of a better term. And I don't want to put words in your mouth. What was your experience? Like, what.
What were you going through on the inside?
[00:20:43] Speaker C: Well, at that point, you know, I didn't know anything really about the enemy. And the enemy had completely isolated me. Like, I didn't have any men speaking into my life. I didn't have any community.
And I just had a ton of self hate because I felt like a failure. I was. I wasn't being successful in my job. I wasn't being successful in my marriage. And so I just kind of completely shut off from the world. And, you know, I would come home and go straight to the bedroom and just kind of keep away from. From everyone. And I was. I was such a coward at that moment, too, because I just. I didn't have.
I don't want to say that. I got to watch what I say.
I didn't have the courage to file for a divorce. I just was gonna. I was gonna wait for her to file.
And.
And then it just got to the point where Alyssa says it all the time. She. She hated me and she wanted me to die.
And.
And even in that, I remember the moment that we were in the kitchen one day, and Alyssa came to me and she apologized. She said, I've been disrespectful to you. And the Lord has told me that divorce is not an option. And so at that point, I was like, well, crap.
I mean, if divorce is not an option, we've got to make this work.
And then I'll let you kind of go with that.
[00:22:22] Speaker D: Yeah. So I just built up so many anger, resentment, bitterness towards him because he wasn't the man that I thought he was. And so I had. I love Jesus. I was in Bible studies.
I had my community.
But then there was this part of me that just despised my husband. And truly, it was like, if he's in an accident and dies, man, that is the way to go if you're a Christian girl and you lose your husband and everybody feels sorry for you. And so I really just believe the lies, that life would be better if he wasn't around. And so I was waiting. He was super into CrossFit at this time, and I had actually gained a lot of weight because I was so. I mean, it was really bad. He was really angry. And we can. We can get out of our circles and talk about each other because we've done this. So, I mean, just. We've hashed this out so much. But he was so angry, he would just yell to get his point across
[00:23:20] Speaker A: for the kids and stuff.
[00:23:21] Speaker D: Yell. I would shut down and withdraw. So I turned to food, and just because it was such a comfort for me, because food didn't talk back or yell at me or anything like that, I found this comfort in just completely trying to push him out. And so he was very, very, very fit at this time.
And so he was. I was waiting for him to have an affair. He was waiting for me to file. So that's kind of the point we were at. So finally one day I told God I was done. I'm like, I cannot live this way anymore. This is not good for me. You start recounting all the lies of, I married the wrong person, my kids deserve a better dad, all the things. And so it made sense. It was practical. It was like, this is what needs to happen next. But I was also a Christian woman, and I'm like, well, I can't file without good reason. And just because he's a jerk, I want him to screw up so that I can be justified in what happens. I told God that I was done. I'm done with this. I can't do it anymore. And I literally opened my Bible, First Corinthians 7, and in those verses, that's what God just revealed to me.
Divorce is not an option. And you are to be a believer in any situation I put you in. And I was like, well, shoot a monkey. I did not want to do that.
And so I knew that God was calling me to obedience. I had to apologize for my part. And in the crazy thing about that is, in my head, the voices are like, nothing's gonna change. Why bother wasting your time? It was. It was almost audible that the voices in my head were saying that. But I did. I just said I. And I had no idea what was going to happen next. But one thing that Brian doesn't say, which I think is hilarious, is I followed that up with. I.
I set a counseling session with a guy at the church. And this was like. I mean, Bill knows at the time, then marriage minister now.
He.
He was in a very bad accident. So he had just come back, like, was seeing people.
Yeah, he had just come back and. And started seeing people. And so I was like, we're gonna go see him. And Brian lost his mind because he cared so much about what other people thought.
[00:25:42] Speaker A: Right, right.
[00:25:43] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:25:44] Speaker D: So shut me up. Am I talking too much? No, no, you're doing.
[00:25:48] Speaker A: Doing.
[00:25:48] Speaker B: You guys are doing great. You guys are doing great.
[00:25:50] Speaker A: What I appreciate is the authenticity and the reality that you're bringing. And I feel like a lot of people are in there, but because we don't talk about this, they're going through this journey alone, and they feel like the lies are the truth because they don't hear any counter conversations. And the fact that God was willing to take you to that scripture to kind of convict you a little bit and kind of say, no, you're in this, like, now, let's get after the hard work making it happen.
But I would love to know from you again, like, there's so much built up resentment and there's so much built up hurt and scars and scabs and everything else. What was that process? Because I know that doesn't end in a day. Yeah, like, the healing doesn't take place in a moment. It takes place over a long time. So what did you guys engage in once he gets on board? And I would love to know kind of your thoughts on how you got on board with this. We're in. We're going to heal this. How did you get over the resentment that can build up over those years?
[00:26:46] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:26:48] Speaker D: That's a good question. I mean, it truly was just giving it to the Lord, but in our situation, it was.
It was Brian putting his yes on the table and walking out and doing hard things because, like, he Said at this time, he didn't have anyone in his life. I took the kids to church by myself, birthday parties by myself. Brian was not present. And so he would. He would go. I remember he went to the movies by himself. I was like, you're a weird duck.
And so he would go do stuff on his own. But he was living such a lonely life. And so.
So for me, it was just, God, I can't do it anymore. Trying to surrender and just trying to. But I also had really good community around me. I had women who were speaking truth over me and not telling me, he's a deadbeat, you should just leave him. They were like, you know, God's bigger than this situation, which in that circumstance, it's super easy to say when you're not in it, but you need those people surrounding you to encourage you and speak the truth of. Of that over you. And so for me, it was the community that I had and really just having. I had nothing left. I was done. I was at the end of my rope. And I was totally relying on the Lord for the next steps. Because the next steps unfolded quickly because we went and met with Joe. And how that all came about. Brian ended up going on a men's retreat.
[00:28:11] Speaker B: This is great. I mean, I feel like we're hitting all the tension, all those, like, tension points.
[00:28:15] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:28:16] Speaker B: Because, Brian, I would love to hear, okay, after that counseling session, what changed in your life that you're like, I need to do this. Like, she talked about going on the retreat, but work through some of your story of, like, here's the practical that happened to me during this. During this time, after she said, hey, forgive me for what I've done. We're going to go do this. Go and meet Joe for, like, counseling. But then what happened in your heart and life after that?
[00:28:42] Speaker C: Well, I think in the counseling, Joe brought up a couple things after he heard her story that I'd never heard before. He said, brian, the enemy has his foot on your throat and is keeping you from experiencing the life that God had created you to live.
And. And so I didn't know anything about the enemy. Second, he said, brian, you're not a bad guy.
[00:29:05] Speaker A: And.
[00:29:05] Speaker C: And the way that I believed about myself or thought about myself is I thought I was a failure and that I. I didn't think I was worthy of anything.
And so he followed that with, and next weekend, we have a men's retreat.
And at that point in my life with no friends, I was like, oh, hell no.
I'm not going to a Men's retreat to hang out with a bunch of dudes that I don't know.
[00:29:30] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:29:30] Speaker B: Share my feelings. Yeah, exactly.
[00:29:33] Speaker C: But I went on that retreat, and it was a complete God thing.
God completely just softened my heart. And I was at a point in my life where I was rock bottom. You know, I didn't have any other. I just came to the Lord and I was like, I can't do this on my own. And he was like, okay. And he just walked me through this journey of healing through that weekend by showing me truth that I had never heard before and so completely changed my heart. And I know this isn't normal, but, like, when I came back, I was. I was a different guy. I was a changed man.
[00:30:11] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:30:11] Speaker C: And God had completely changed my heart. And through that, you know, just unpacking all the wounds and all the stuff that was.
That was there in the marriage and in my heart, just walking through that for the next, you know, few weeks with Alyssa and just unpacking that stuff, God really came in and just restored the marriage and kind of set us on a new path.
[00:30:34] Speaker A: So, first off, I love what God does on men's retreats, and that's why we have one coming up in April.
[00:30:41] Speaker B: Yeah, we have one coming up April 10th.
Sign up today.
No, but, but.
[00:30:48] Speaker A: So there's an internal shift in both of you guys that God has coordinated and made happen, but those internal shifts express themselves in behavior and change behavior. So I would love to know from both of you guys, what were some immediate change behaviors that you saw from fruit from in the other person to start to become a better wife and a better husband in that process. So, Brian, I'm going to ask you first. Like, so you've had this moment, you've had this epiphany. You realize that God is for you, not against you. He's got a plan for you. What were some of the things that you engaged in behaviorally that you're like, this is going to make an impact in a positive way for my wife and family. And, Alyssa, I would love to hear from you.
What were some of the behavior things that you realized he needed from you to help him come alive and change the person he was?
[00:31:36] Speaker C: Well, I think for me, it was just a heart change. You know, at that point, I realized how much God truly loves me, and it allowed me to love myself. And through that, it helped me love Alyssa and our kids like God had intended it to be the whole time.
But I just realized that when I started showing love, love and respect to Alyssa, her heart posture changed towards me of more respect as well. And so I think that was the biggest change is just being able to love. Like, I, you know, hated myself so much that I didn't even know what love looked like.
[00:32:20] Speaker B: Wow.
Sorry. We're just kind of processing that. I mean, so. So how did you experience true love from God? Like, what happened in your life for that specific moment that you're like, I got to make this change? I mean, like. Like, what. What happened with you?
[00:32:35] Speaker C: Well, I think the whole. The whole concept of grace was foreign to me. You know, growing up in kind of a legalistic church, it was, do the right things, and if you don't, then, you know, you just hope that what you do do is good enough. And he just showed me that it's not about how much we screw up. It's about his love and his grace towards us and, you know, just those truths of grace. But not only that, but just who I am in Christ. Like, you know, he calls me a warrior, he calls me a son. And those are not things that I would come up with my own or think about myself. But he really. He kind of showed me identity through that.
[00:33:23] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, Paul, he has this beautiful part, and I believe it's Ephesians 4, where he talks about, husbands love your wives, and wives respect your husband.
And so specifically, Brian, what were some things that you did that showed your wife that you loved her? And, Alyssa, what are some things that you started to do to show Brian that you are beginning to respect him again?
[00:33:46] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:33:49] Speaker C: Yeah. So I think. I don't know, you can probably speak to that, how I. How I treated you differently. Yeah, but I think it was.
It was just grace, man. Like, you know, Alyssa's. Listen, I's personality are very different.
And so she has a lot of great ideas, but, you know, I was the no man. You know, every time she would come to me, I would immediately shut her down and say, no, that's stupid. We're not going to do that.
And so I think pretty. Pretty soon after I came back, she would come to me with these ideas, and I wouldn't shut her down. I would listen to her, try to understand her heart behind things. Because her heart is good.
[00:34:31] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:34:32] Speaker C: And I didn't. I never had seen that.
That kind of perspective, but it just. God, just really showed me that Alyssa is an amazing woman. And just.
I wanted to get to know her more.
[00:34:47] Speaker A: So, Alyssa, how about you? What were some things as God's shifting and changing your heart? How were you beginning to express in tangible ways. Respect back for Brian. Even with all of the hurts, all the resentment and all of those scars.
[00:35:01] Speaker D: Yeah. So first I'll say we've talked to a lot of people and I think the caveat with what happened with Brian is the fact that he truly surrendered everything. It wasn't this partial. I'll give you this God, you know, it was a true transformation of the entire heart. And I think once you realize how much you're loved by God, then it does change your life. And so when he came back, it was literally. It took two weeks to unpack and everything that. That God had shown him in. Through that in that weekend. So he literally came home and he is a crier now. He was not a crier before.
And so my.
It's just crazy. Like, just some. Just when God gets a hold of you, he trans. He can transform in an instant. It is not everybody else's story, but, like, it is just unbelievable, the change in Brian. And he would say, man, if you could see yourself the way I see you.
That's what he would say when he came back. And I'm like, what are you talking about? Because he was so judgmental before and wanted us to be Ken and Barbie because it mattered what everybody else thought. And then here he is telling me that he loves me when I'm 60, 70 pounds overweight and I'm not comfortable in my own skin. And I'm just. I'm just. Just trying to just literally survive because it's been me and the kids and just trying to control and juggle life and all of the things. And so for him to come back and just be able to love me and see me where I am, that was huge for me. So that's one thing he did. And then on my side, it was showing respect to Brian and. And it is so easy. That's the cool thing about this, is it doesn't take much to affirm. Affirm your spouse. Like, right, I'd be like. And. And really I had so much.
Like, I had the whole list of things that.
The agreements that I had made, the lies that I had made about Brian. And. And then it's like, God, you're gonna have to show me what you see in Brian, because I don't see anything in him. And so it was. And again, this is before God completely came back a different person. But it's like, you've got to show me what you see in him. So it was like, hey, thanks for working so hard for our family. Thank you for providing. Thank you for. So it wasn't like, oh, my gosh, you love our kids so well, because he didn't. It was like, God, you've got to show me, because I have nothing. I can't see. See him. I can't. So you've got to show me as him being your child. What are. What are. What are some things I can affirm him in.
And so now I can just be like, you're awesome, dude. Like, you're so buff. You're so. You know, it's like, it's easy to, like, to affirm Brian because words of affirmation for any guy are important. And so I think showing respect and doing those things. And so it was really cool because it.
God can do anything. He absolutely can. But I have to die to myself and ask God to fill me with his spirit, because I. I no longer. I mean, I try. I can't control. I can't control what Brian does. But in and through what God can do, it's like he can show me how to find ways to love Brian and affirm him and the man that he is and the man that he's transforming him into.
[00:38:29] Speaker A: Right. I love that. And real quick, Bill, someone said once, and I think it's so true, respect to a man is the word. Thank you.
Like, and to be specific with those thank yous and understand, like, it's still not perfect, but I appreciate the small things that I'm seeing that you're doing. And thank you. And for a guy that's like, wind in our sails, man, we will conquer Middle Earth if a woman behind us is like, man, thank you so much for investing in the kids. I know that's not easy for you right now, but I appreciate what you're doing there. That's huge.
[00:39:03] Speaker B: I love. I love this and getting to see.
So I know these guys from our life group that we had in Midland when we were there, and so knew you in the beginning. And then all of a sudden, one day I meet Brian again. I'm like, you're not the same at all. Like, who are you? Jesus with huge muscles. Like, who are you? You know? And so I loved seeing that, and I love the restoration. And so nine years in different marriage. I know there's still struggles. I know there's still battles, but knowing you guys and we had this conversation, you're like, it's worth it. It's worth what we're doing.
[00:39:37] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:39:37] Speaker B: What would you say to the guy or the lady who is literally waiting for their husband to die or the Divorce papers to get thrown in their face. What would you say to them right now? What encouragement would you say to them in this journey?
[00:39:53] Speaker D: I would say, stop. Stop trying to control. It's actually in, in the Bible, in Genesis, that part of the fall is that you will try. You will try to control your husband. And so it's all women we try to control. And it's like, you have to get out of the way because God wants the credit for what is to come. And if you try to control so much, you're going to think that you did something. I promise, there's nothing you can do to change the heart of your husband. And so it's like, you have got to release that. And when you release it, you're giving control back to the Lord. And it is. That's the thing that keeps me in my lane, because it's like, I can't change this situation. I can't change his heart. And so I am just. If I pursue Jesus and I focus on him, then he will provide what I need and really changes. I think it changes everything. And so that's what I would say is you've got to stop. Stop striving. Stop.
Stop trying to look good for everybody else. Stop. I mean, it's exhausting. And you're. You're killing yourself inside. Whether it's depression or suicidal thoughts or, or just like your, your hair's literally falling out.
Like, what is it that you. You just can't continue this pace any longer. Trying to, to keep up the facade that you're living in. It's like it's time to, to let it go.
[00:41:18] Speaker B: Oh, man, I love this. Brian, what would you share with the guy who's sitting here listening, going, nope, you don't know my wife. What would you say to them?
[00:41:27] Speaker C: I mean, it's kind of along the same lines, is like, man, you. You can't change her. You need to focus on you and your relationship with the Lord. And if you pour into that and allow God to come in and change your heart, like, he will. He will heal the marriage.
But I think guys are fixers, right? And so when there's a problem, we want to go in and try to fix it or fix them. And that's never fruitful. So it's like, quit trying to fix other people and especially your wife. Just, just work on fixing your relationship with the Lord and, and to get into community with other men that are. Are that believe the same thing that you do so that you can walk in accountability, man. And that's the thing that I tried to tell. And I know you guys do the same thing is with guys is like, it's not natural to. To be in community, but it's necessary.
[00:42:27] Speaker B: Yeah, I. I know you have something to say, but you wanted to say it earlier.
Guys, grow some balls and begin to get that community. I'm serious. Like, have the courage that Joshua had crossing the Jordan, to go. I'm gonna take the step. So I could either fast forward my life, and I could be single, and my kids could have two different Christmases and holidays the rest of their life. I could be seeing my grandchildren on my own because my spouse is no longer with me, or I could have what Brian and Alyssa have now, and I think that's it, but go for it, man.
[00:42:59] Speaker A: Well, and I was gonna say to summarize, I think the thing that I hear is both of you guys surrender to God and his lordship, which I think is the key. And from that, you learn how to serve each other in ways that helped each other come alive to the person that God created them to do. And you only do that in community. And the greatest community that God gives us is our spouse. And so, gentlemen, if you find that you're in a controlling situation or you're being controlled, pray for surrender. Pray that God would do what only he can do to change the heart. That you'd start to see the beauty in your wife again, to see her as the way. The way that God sees her and wives, the same thing back the other way. And then figure out ways that can serve them to make an impact in their heart and in their lives. Not to get something from them, but to help them come alive in who God created them. Oh, love it. I love it.
[00:43:45] Speaker B: Guys, any final thoughts before we move into the fast five? Anything else you want to share with those couples or anybody else? Anything else you do?
[00:43:52] Speaker D: Yeah. So last, I guess, a couple weeks ago, Eric Clark on stage, he's like, it's not biblical that there's one person for everybody and that you have a soulmate. It's not there. You married the wrong person. So you can get over that right now and realize that this journey is about making me more Christ. Like, right? And so it's like, I have got to realize that the things that drive me crazy about Brian, I have to look at it and go, God, what are you trying to show me in and through that? So it's the self reflection, because I would always pick up a mirror and put it in front of Brian. I'm like, look at you. You keep doing this wrong when it's like, turn the mirror around and go, what can I grow? What is God trying to refine in me through this? And. And let God work. It's not about fixing the other person. It's about me and what God's doing, trying to do in and through me and the person he's creating me to be. So I think that was. That's really important to know. I mean, I think it's. It's hilarious that you married the wrong person. But everybody. I mean, that's not. The ultimate goal is to find the perfect person. The ultimate goal is God can draw us to himself and make us more like him.
[00:44:58] Speaker A: And I love it.
Go, Brian.
[00:45:00] Speaker C: Go ahead. No, I was just gonna say the kind of final thoughts for me is like. And something that we try to share with. With other married couples is like, there. There. There is no hopeless situation.
You know, there's always hope. And we. We're a living testament to that. And we just want to be able to. To share with other people that nothing's beyond repair with Jesus.
[00:45:27] Speaker B: Amen.
[00:45:27] Speaker A: I love it.
Old friend of mine said, the culture tells you that marriage is to make you happy. God tells us marriage is to make us holy.
[00:45:35] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:45:36] Speaker A: And I think that's exactly what you're talking about, and it's so true. And when you. When you understand that, the whole perspective shifts and changes on that.
[00:45:44] Speaker B: So absolutely. Look at it.
[00:45:45] Speaker D: Absolutely.
[00:45:45] Speaker B: It's worth the fight. It's worth the fight.
[00:45:47] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:45:48] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:45:48] Speaker A: Go for it.
[00:45:48] Speaker B: Keep going.
[00:45:49] Speaker D: It's so different. We are so different night and day, even getting on this podcast. He's like, we gotta be prepped. We gotta be ready. We gotta have it all figured out. Tech's gotta be working perfect. I'm like, if it's not, we'll figure it out.
[00:46:01] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:46:02] Speaker D: We are. We are different for a reason. And that the goal is to work together and respect each other in and through that. And. And we do. There are some things that I've let go of. Like, Brody, Brian has to be 20 minutes early wherever we go, and instead of fighting it anymore, we're just early.
[00:46:18] Speaker B: I'm going to be early.
[00:46:19] Speaker D: It's good.
[00:46:20] Speaker B: I love it.
Wow.
[00:46:22] Speaker A: I love it, man. Thank you guys for your transparency.
[00:46:25] Speaker B: So great.
[00:46:25] Speaker A: And your willingness to kind of revisit some of the difficult, dark seasons. And I love how God redeems the brokenness and restores it for his glory in his name. And so just thank you both so much for this journey that you've been on and Being willing to share it. So, Bill.
[00:46:39] Speaker B: No, I love it. I can't remember the exact scripture in Psalm, but it says that God heals the brokenhearted.
[00:46:44] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:46:45] Speaker B: And I think if we look at it and go, nope, this is the end. This is the detriment of my life.
This is the cross that I bear instead to say, what if I allowed God to intervene in here and make the changes that need to happen? And you guys did exactly that. And it's exciting.
Your story is. I know it's not perfect, but it's a testimony of God's grace and power to change whatever is going on in our life. I love it. I love it. I love it. So good.
[00:47:11] Speaker D: Yeah, God's not looking for perfect people. He's just looking. And that's the thing, is we would miss out on the beauty and the richness of what we have now had we had given up. And so it's like it's a sweeter, more intimate relationship now than it could have ever been before had we not gone through the difficult times. And so he absolutely refines us through those.
[00:47:30] Speaker B: If you guys are in the. If you're listening and you're in the Midland area, they do a marriage night on Wednesday nights at Stonegate Fellowship. I know you two are leaders of that as well. So if you need to, we will put a link for that info in the bio as well, because that's what you need. It's just this practical.
I mean, just the reality of him. My spouse is a jerk. But. But I. But I want to. I want to try and love them more than I want to just escape. So I love.
[00:47:55] Speaker A: And if you want to connect with them, info known legacy.org we'll get you guys connected. If you have any questions, comments, or practical, like, how do I. How do we move forward? Yeah, I know they would love to speak into that. So.
[00:48:05] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely, guys. Such a testimony of God's grace. I love it. So thank you guys so much for your faithfulness.
And as we finish today, we have a segment called Fast five.
There it is. So dumb.
It's a Kyle in the corner pulling through one more time, making it happen. So, guys, are you ready for these Fast Five questions over here?
[00:48:30] Speaker C: Sure.
[00:48:30] Speaker B: Awesome. Question number one. If you could tell people to go support a cause or a ministry, what would it be
[00:48:38] Speaker A: known?
[00:48:38] Speaker C: Legacy.
[00:48:42] Speaker B: The pull quote. He just threw a softball at you.
[00:48:46] Speaker D: I really think Wild at Heart has been great. I mean, yes, that is a great resource that. I mean, I have local stuff that's not anything, but. Yeah, I really.
It's really cool to partner with people that are doing great things for the Lord and desire to outreach and to too. My thing is, you gotta be real and raw, and so that's who I try to surround myself with. And for people, you really. We don't need any more people trying to have it figured out or perfection. So really align with those people that are vulnerable and honest.
[00:49:20] Speaker B: Amen.
[00:49:21] Speaker A: Amen.
[00:49:21] Speaker B: So good. So good. If you could describe legacy with a word or a phrase, what would it be?
[00:49:28] Speaker D: Future.
[00:49:30] Speaker B: I like it.
[00:49:31] Speaker C: Generational faithfulness.
[00:49:34] Speaker A: Nice.
[00:49:35] Speaker B: I love it.
[00:49:35] Speaker D: That was better.
[00:49:36] Speaker A: I appreciate the fact. No, they're both good.
[00:49:38] Speaker D: About your questions again, I did my homework.
[00:49:46] Speaker B: I see. I'm more just like Alyssa. I'm like, yeah, we'll get. He'll figure it out. Yeah, we'll figure it out on the fly. I like that attitude, but I think it would say future. Generational impact. We can do it all together. See, you guys are a perfect team. Look at that. We all worked it together. So awesome. If you had to change careers, what would you change it to?
[00:50:04] Speaker D: Oh, I would totally be a realtor. That's what I would do.
Yeah. But then I watched Dateline, and there was a lot of realtors who got murdered, and so I was like, that's probably not so.
[00:50:15] Speaker B: Probably not. See, that's. That's so. So. Why?
[00:50:17] Speaker D: Because I'm very naive.
[00:50:18] Speaker A: Stop listening to the murder podcast.
[00:50:20] Speaker B: No, stop. This is my call to action. Because my wife can watch a murder thing, and she's eating popcorn, and I'm like, is she, like, figuring out a way to execute?
[00:50:29] Speaker D: Used to. Used to, yes.
[00:50:32] Speaker B: She was, like, taking notes.
I get it. Don't you worry.
[00:50:37] Speaker A: Mistakes to avoid. All right, number one.
[00:50:39] Speaker B: Brian, what about you? If you could change careers, what would you do?
[00:50:42] Speaker C: I think I would be a pickleball coach.
[00:50:44] Speaker D: You would not.
[00:50:49] Speaker B: That's awesome.
[00:50:51] Speaker C: Brian.
[00:50:51] Speaker A: For the home run. Love it.
[00:50:54] Speaker B: That's awesome.
[00:50:55] Speaker A: I feel like we need some pictures of you guys playing pickleball together.
[00:50:57] Speaker B: We do. I think I need some for the promo
[00:51:01] Speaker A: growth mindset.
[00:51:02] Speaker B: Yet he doesn't play future generations.
Awesome. Okay, if you had a go to fruit, what would it be?
[00:51:11] Speaker A: And just so you know, there's a lot of judgment that will happen on this answer, so I hope they're good.
[00:51:14] Speaker B: Yes. Yes. So if you had a go to fruit.
Yes. What would you. Oh, you don't have.
[00:51:19] Speaker A: No idea.
[00:51:19] Speaker B: Someone said chocolate one time, and we're like, we'll take it. We'll take that answer. If you had a go to fruit. What would it be?
[00:51:26] Speaker D: Strawberries.
[00:51:27] Speaker A: It's a good choice. Good choice. Solid.
[00:51:29] Speaker C: I would say pineapple.
[00:51:31] Speaker B: Oh, we haven't had a pineapple yet.
[00:51:33] Speaker A: No, I'm a little allergic. It kind of messes with my mouth. I'll be honest with you.
[00:51:37] Speaker B: Pineapple. Okay, so this is it, too.
[00:51:41] Speaker A: It looks amazing. It's all spiny on the outside, but deliciousness on the inside. Kind of like me.
[00:51:51] Speaker B: Oh, man. Okay, I guess it's a 4A.
What kind of apple would you guys choose?
[00:51:57] Speaker A: Oh, this is the one.
[00:51:58] Speaker B: What apple would you guys choose?
[00:52:00] Speaker C: Honey Crisp.
[00:52:01] Speaker B: Yes. Okay. What about you, Alyssa?
[00:52:04] Speaker D: I mean, are they called Gala. Gala Apples.
[00:52:09] Speaker B: That's okay. That's okay. As long as you didn't say Red Delicious. You said Red Delicious.
[00:52:13] Speaker A: We were gonna, like.
[00:52:14] Speaker B: We're gonna stop that right now. We're done.
I'll even take Granny Smith over a Red Delicious because they're not delicious.
[00:52:21] Speaker A: They're not. They're red, but they are not delicious.
[00:52:23] Speaker B: Red granules have to call them delicious. Exactly. No, really. It's really good. You should try this. Sure. God. We don't know what you're talking about.
[00:52:31] Speaker D: Apple connoisseur. I don't know.
Whatever. I actually like little apples.
[00:52:35] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:52:36] Speaker D: Okay, Kitchen now. So if I can just find the smaller one. The big ones just seem like a little bit of overkill.
[00:52:42] Speaker C: Alyssa's favorite fruit is Taco Villa.
[00:52:45] Speaker D: No.
[00:52:45] Speaker B: It's awesome.
[00:52:47] Speaker D: Honey Crisps that are, like, this big and they're $2.70.
[00:52:51] Speaker B: I know. They're like four pounds of an apple. I know. Although Taco Villa is the best because they. They put a little tomato on top of the taco. It's pretty incredible.
[00:53:00] Speaker A: Like, so, you know, you get your health food.
[00:53:02] Speaker D: Good stuff.
[00:53:02] Speaker B: Exactly. So there is fruit, right? There is fruit on there. Exactly. Tomatoes of fruit.
[00:53:05] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:53:06] Speaker D: Another way we are a little bit different. A little bit.
[00:53:10] Speaker B: That's awesome. I love it. Okay, last question. What do you want to be remembered for by those closest to you?
[00:53:18] Speaker D: Ooh, how I love. For sure.
[00:53:21] Speaker B: Like it.
[00:53:21] Speaker A: It's a good one.
[00:53:22] Speaker B: It's a good one. Brian.
[00:53:23] Speaker A: What about you beat that one, Brian?
[00:53:25] Speaker C: My pickle ball skills.
[00:53:27] Speaker D: Oh, my.
Y'.
[00:53:30] Speaker B: All. The Grand Slam.
[00:53:31] Speaker A: The Grand Slam.
[00:53:33] Speaker D: No, it's not a Grand Slam. Give me strength. It is not.
What are we talking about?
[00:53:42] Speaker B: I have to get, like, an AI picture. Brian, like, with his paddle. Killing it.
[00:53:48] Speaker A: Killing it out there.
[00:53:49] Speaker D: Even with no shirt. That would.
[00:53:50] Speaker B: Exactly. No, we don't want people to lust. Okay, Alyssa.
[00:53:53] Speaker A: All right. Yeah.
[00:53:54] Speaker B: No, starting with me. I Don't want to do that.
[00:53:56] Speaker A: No stumbling blocks.
[00:53:57] Speaker B: No, exactly. No stumbling blocks for us.
[00:53:59] Speaker D: He's like one of the most modest guys ever. He would never.
If there's a shirtless picture of him, it's AI. It's not.
[00:54:06] Speaker B: It's definitely. Then we are going to make this happen.
[00:54:08] Speaker A: Kyle, get after it.
[00:54:11] Speaker B: Kyle in the corner. Make it happen. Make it so. Make it so. Guys, this has been incredible. I love that you gave hope to, to those who feel like they're in a hopeless marriage. But man, so much, so much truth spoken today.
Thank you guys for your faithfulness. And like I said, guys, we're gonna put the link in the bottom for, for Stonegate's marriage night. If you are in west Texas area, it's worth the drive. I know you guys are people that come all the way from like Odessa, which doesn't seem like a far ways away, but it's still pretty far. 20, 30 minutes. Make sure you guys get, get a point to be out there. Guys, thank you for your faithfulness. We'll have you on again. I mean, it's been a blessing. Thank you guys so much for being, being here. Hang on for a minute. But guys, thank you so much for listening today. We are so excited about what God can do in your marriage.
[00:54:53] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:54:53] Speaker B: If you're thinking that it's hopeless, it is not. God has great plans for you. Make sure you check out our links for our men's retreat, the Bible study. We want you to be a part of something you are worth not being. Not doing life alone with God has bigger plans for you. Travis, final thoughts.
[00:55:09] Speaker A: There is no such thing as Disney happy ever after. It is about surrender and serving and get after it, man.
[00:55:16] Speaker B: You guys have a great week. We will see you soon.
[00:55:19] Speaker A: God bless.
Thanks for listening to the Known Legacy podcast. We'd love to hear from you. So email us your questions or comments to Infonolegacy.
